WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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