jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
