I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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