yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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