my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
