Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I FOUND THE LEGS
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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