It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
