I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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