I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
