There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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