Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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