so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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