We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
