Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
