I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
