I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
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I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
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I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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