Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
