i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
