Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
