maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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