Sry I called you an 8
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize