And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
