In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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