Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
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I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
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We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.