How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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