Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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