You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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