i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize
