i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
