im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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