yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Randomize
