Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize