Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
