Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
