Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize