Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
