Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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