so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
