it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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