I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
