You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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