We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
