Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize