i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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