i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
