doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
We had to coat check the pizza.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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