we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
