Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize