if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I love black thongs
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
