Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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