so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina