I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
